MY NAME IS AANNNNNNNEEEE!!!!!! Okay. that was me copying a Jay-Z song. So here I am a year almost after starting here, writing after a long nice hiatus! Still drinkin, still havin issues, still smokin pot but damn does it feel good!! So either Love Me Or Leave Me Alone! ~Tweekz

I just pulled an all nighter with a almost complete stranger. I've met him once before, for about two minutes, and that's all. Do you have any idea how hard it is to pull an all nighter with someone you're unfamiliar with? That's just something you don't do, you know? How can you handle being with someone for almost TWELVE STRAIGHT HOURS! when you don't know anything about them? What about the awkward silences? Running out of things to talk about? No sexual anything! Well I'll tell you one...

I had to smoke weed. I feel bad, I was planning on saving it. I took some "uppers" today but since my stomach is basically empty (except for some coffee and cookies at 9:30) and it is now 2:37. It's amazing that I'm here in Morris for little more than two weeks and I've already forgotten how to control my stomach. But I reinforced my control again. But then my stomach started hurting because of the pills and the lack of anything in the stomach and it occurred to me that I would have t...

I have these days of incredible strength, where I don't think about him, don't consider why I'm dreaming about him, even forget he's alive. Then there are the other days when the memory of him is heavier than a stone. It's a big ball of lead deposited in my heart, and I can feel it dragging down in my chest. Something like asthma. On my deathbed I will pray To the gods and the angels Like a pagan to anyone Who will take me to heaven To a place I recall I was there so long ago ...

Guess who's bizack!!!! J/K I might not really be back, maybe I'm just visiting. Anyway. As for the title of this article. Hey asshole if you're reading this like you say you do, you left your fucking Concrete Blonde CD in my car. And as much as I like Concrete Blonde every time I look at that CD I think of you and thinking of you kinda makes me wanna gag myself with a spoon. Come to think of it, why haven't I just destroyed the CD? I mean, it's not like you're ever going to get it b...

Sounds like a negative title but it's not. Anyways, it's good to laugh at yourself, isn't it? I'm supposed to be walking to Dairy Queen right now with Rachel (actually, by this time we'd probably already be back here) but she is about 45 minutes late after I called her. So here I am blogging. I have obviously not had any time to blog lately. That's because A) I'm at home and dont have 24 hr internet access and my dad is fucking ridiculously addicted to the internet and is on it fro...

If I'm not in love with you, what is this I'm going through? Lyrics by Faith Hill. I hate Faith Hill, and only discovered this song cause I won the CD for Post Prom one year, and decided I'd see if I found ANY songs I like before I threw it away. And then I discovered that song. And that's how I feel right now. I mean, I don't need anyone to tell me I'm not in love with Philip, I already know I have loved him for quite a while. I But I suppose I'm IN love with him again. Or I didn't ...

Haha. My mom is a crazy lady. Well, okay, so she isn't, but I tell ya. Sometimes she asks me these questions, and it just totally throws me for a loop!!! I mean, really. Why does she ask these questions? It's like she's reading my mind... a part of my mind I don't want to go into. So I was sitting on the couch yesterday afternoon watching Ice Age (so cute!!!!!!) and my mom yelled from the other room, "So, did Philip become your boyfriend again last night?" And me, I just sat there like ...

I think I drink too much. Sometimes I tell myself, Jesus you're an alcoholic. Then, I defend myself: I'm not an alcoholic, I just drink too much. I don't even waste time saying "I drink a little bit" or anything like that. And I don't even know if I NEED it, I mean, I KNOW I don't but I don't know if I'm addicted, I just can't stop. I have no control over myself. Even last night, I didn't even want to go out. I don't know why I did... I shouldn't have. I didn't party, we just drank. And I ...

Last night was wild. We got really drunk, me and some friends, and it was all a good time!!! Well, for the most part, at least. Mine and my best friend's "neighbor" (cute kid ) got us some weed and it was all good. I have a place to move, too. If I want to. It's 225 a month, and in Carlton. I haven't decided yet, but it would be cool. Anyhow. On to the life lesson I learned last night. We were all drunk, and I was in the backseat of Shan's Camaro, pretty near passed out, when I heard h...

The more people complain to me the more I realize how much my life has sucked. In fact, it's not just people complaining to me. It's people complaining period. I mean, try living your entire life with someone who hates your guts and just wants you to fucking die. Try living with someone who does everything possible to make you feel as low as you possibly can. Can and does. I'm taking shots right now. The sting of alcohol down my throat is the only thing that reminds me I'm alive. It'...

There is something seriously wrong with me. Of course, we've been through this about a million times before. It's just, I'm not getting better. Blame it on the fact that I haven't taken my zoloft for a little less than a week. Maybe it's been more. Blame it on whatever you want to, actually. I don't much care. All I know is I am starting to get desperate. Desperate to get out of... here. My life and my self. I've got two serious choices now and I am ready to make either of th...

[I was reading an article by Unfairman and I liked it a lot. I wrote a great reply to it, and I decided I liked the reply so much that I would repost it as an article. It shows my superb wit and my weird, weird mind. Read on!] You wanna know something? Those Penny Donation things make me mad. Hear me out, though. They make me mad for a very good reason. One day when I was very stoned, I went to the local pizza place with my friend, and I was standing in front of said Penn...

This is the second part of my "desperation blog" (AKA I'm Running Away). This is the questions and the answers, hopefully. Where will I go? I don't know. I know that I cannot go home. And home is more than just lil ol' Moose Lake... Home is Duluth, Cloquet, Cromwell (especially). These are the places that I cannot go, the places that I must leave behind me in order to get ahead . So where shall I go? Who knows. And how am I going to do it? I can't do it without money, th...