When Will I Be Loved?

Never??

Published on January 17, 2004 By Tangled Wishes In Blogging

Ok, I think I'm pretty cute.
But I don't understand. I do not know one guy who is even kind of interested in me. Not a soul!! With the exception of Ben Uno, not a single male here in Morris has ever even looked at me twice. And I'm cute!! But maybe I'm not?? Because uglier people are getting boyfriends... And girlfriends... And where am I in this? On the sidelines! Watching! Not even getting ANY offers! And I'm sweet. I smile. I'm friendly. I talk to people. But still nothing. What the hell am I supposed to think?? It's a blow to the ego. There is not one good reason why no one is even interested in me, unless I really am fat and ugly without knowing it. And I SHOULD know this!!
I'm just so scared. What if I have to spend the rest of my life alone??? I can't handle it! I can hardly make it a day by myself. I want to fall in love. I want someone to sweep me off my feet. I want roses for once in my life. I want kisses, and holding hands, and phone calls, and meals together. And sex. I want sex! Jesus christ, how often is it that a cute girl wants sex??? I want it a lot! And I'm good! I know I am!! But still, nothing. Nothing at all.
Do I have to sell my soul??
I'm breaking. I've been broken before. But now... There's nothing. Just the emptiness of my lonely heart. And I'm a happy cheery person! Jesus fucking christ I cannot take this disgust in me that all males have! I FUCKING CAN'T TAKE IT ANY MORE! I KNOW THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH ME! I know this. But there must be. And I can't take it any more. I can't be a fucking old maid. It's not me. I feel like I am going to collapse. Need to drink. Need to drink. Need to drink. WHY!
There is no why, only pain. Loneliness. FUCK YOU MEN! FUCK YOU ALL! YOU'RE ALL FUCKING IDIOTIC! YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW!!! WHY!

Comments (Page 2)

Lunaticus Minimus

on Jan 21, 2004

P.S. can you tell from the peoples' reactions to your post that obviously people are interested in you? Look at em! Heh, sometimes you just gotta find the right crowd.

imajinit

on Feb 10, 2004

this deserves to be revived...

Is this the same "Tangled Wishes" that just posted an article about why you shouldn't have sex?

Gotcha T.W. ... but don't feel bad... i contradict myself all the time...

DRmami

on Feb 12, 2004

i understand your frustration at not having a mate, but things could be worse.. You could be missing a leg, or an arm, and have shit really difficult for you, and then it wouldn't be the question of having a mate, it would be the question of "how the hell am i gonna do this or that". its never as bad as you think, sometimes we get so caught up in ourselves that we tend to block others, or not focus on others at all.. we are too intent on finding something, anything wrong with us so that we have yet another thing to focus on.. i'm going to use myself as an example..I am 24 years old, and I am happily married.. but this wasn't always so.,.. I got married and had a baby at 17, pregnant again at 18, that baby was stillborn at 8 months, then we divorced, i met someone and later on remarried at age 22, by then I had lost another baby due to the baby having deformation in its limbs, then we got pregnant again, this time with a healthy baby boy, who was born at just 5 lbs with the cord wrapped around his throat.. He's ok, thankfully, but while you want someone to be with, I want to have living children.. We have to work hard at what we want, not lose our focus, and most of all stay positive.. If you met man right now, He'd be hearing about "its not fair, I am lonely, no one likes me".. Thats a pretty negative attitude.. Believe me, everything happens for a reason.. and maybe this ti,e is for you to find youself, focus on no one but you, work on your issues.. Look at this time as a blessing... I'm not coming down on you, i'm sorry if its coming across that way.. I just believe that you are a beautiful woman and the right man will come along eventually, and then we all know there is no more focusing on you, its focusing on the relationship..

doris parker

on Feb 14, 2004

dont worrie girl im in the same boat an im 44 so we have to love ourselves and be happy
we women dont need a man to mdefined us . see it this way they are missin out on the best
women in the world. so love yourself and stay strong for the single women.

peace-out
passion

doris parker

on Feb 14, 2004

doris parker

on Feb 14, 2004

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