I got the flu again in the middle of the night. grrrrreeeat thing to wake up to. Four am and i opened my eyes, thinking, hmm, something's not right here. What is it?
I layed in bed for about five more minutes and it hit me. I had to puke. Augh! I just don't know where I stand with puke. I really think puke stories are hilarious, I could laugh at them and listen to them for hours. I also don't really mind the whole process of puking when I am doing it; it doesn't gross me out any worse than taking a shit, except for that i can taste it and that sucks pretty bad. Dry heaving sucks pretty bad too. I can handle it if people are puking in real life, but if I see it in a movie or on TV it just disgusts me to no end.
I guess it wasn't soo bad last night, I only puked for like a half hour, and then i was able to go back to sleep at about 4:45, but I woke up fully at 7 am. Yeah i've been up since seven, and I can't fall back asleep. My head hurts too much and my stomach is too iffy for me to risk hitting the sack.
I moved into my apartment last night. We have to meet him today and get the keys, and give him the money, and from here on out it will be my first home! I slept overnight because I was paranoid about people stealing my shit, so I got sick in my new bathroom. We don't have a lot of furniture, but one thing I noticed when my mom was loading the truck was that I've been trying so hard the past year and a half to leave my past behind me, and here I am leaving home for real and I'm taking with everything that is a part of my past. I started thinking maybe I need to take my past with me, maybe I shouldn't leave it behind because that's what made me who I am and it's important to not forget your roots.
I also FINALLY realized that a big problem for me is that I've got a lot of love and no one to give it to! I really do. Does anyone understand what I'm saying there?
Also another weird thought I had this weekend (i was probably stoned, I did a bit of that this weekend) was that my love is like a piano. I give it to my significant other, but if we break up I leave the piano with him, and sometimes I just really want to play the piano, but I can't. God this is not making any sense. My head hurts too much. Gotta email profs.
Bye
t.w.