Don't you feel like that sometimes?
I do.
So tonight a friend from my hometown (who moved fairly near where I go to school) called me tonight, and we're talking, and then she mentions something about someone saying that I picked up a really bad drug habit, or something along those lines, like, hard drug habit or what was it, that I'm really into hard drugs right now and I'm like, uh, what? It was a funny thought first of all because where I was at the time was a Christian coffee shop where I had been for like, six freaking hours already today doing hardcore homework so that I don't have to cram before my test a week from Monday. So the immediate thought of me as a hard druggie was a little ridiculous there, and then I was like, uh, okay, I don't think I've done anything besides smoke weed for like two months, and I have probably gotten drunk like four or five times in the last two months. It all seemed so stupid, what I was hearing, and thinking about what I've really been doing.
And then it started to bother me thinking that someone from home thinks I have a serious drug habit, and they're obviously talking about it to a lot of people, since if my friend doesn't even LIVE there anymore, and she hears about it?
I don't even live there. And then I got pissed, and am still pissed, about the fact that someone IS spreading that shit around to people I'm friends with, what the hell is up with that? I mean seriously. I don't need that shit going around a small town, people are going to be just crazy and that pisses me off too!!
I think if someone is going to say something about me, they should have the balls to say it to me, too, or ask me about it before they tell the whole world... But of course rumors don't go like that and I guess I don't really care all too much if people are talking crap about me, they can be as stupid as they want to be.
But then again people have called me a drug addict with marijuana (impossible!!!) so, who knows. I guess it's all a matter of personal opinion, isn't it?
I think what really bothers me is that people can't even say anything about the fact that I'm depressed. You know? It's like "Oh Anne's all addicted to hard drugs" or whatever, and that isn't even the issue. Some people do drugs for a reason. But that's besides the whole point--weed isn't really a drug anyhow.
And then there was this egocentric imperialist asshole at the coffeeshop tonight saying that it's fucking unfair that Native Americans get to go to school here for cheaper, because by forcing the Native Americans in this area to go to boarding school here in the 1890s and up was a favor, it was doing them good. Umm, can we say hello stupid white male? And then the girl that was arguing with him was telling him stuff about what happened, and she got it from notes that she took, and he was like, "No notes, no textbooks, that doesn't mean anything, that's wrong, your notes and your textbook are wrong."
Yeah that's some serious skinhead tendencies. I can't wait until a big African American guy whoops his ass intellectually and then physically. I wish that happened to every racist person alive.
But then sometimes I really feel like I hate white people. Or maybe just men. But neither of that is wholly true, I just hate our modern white society. It's BS what we're expected to conform to. But I'll save that for another rant.
~Fully Feminist, Fully Native American. Eradicate idiocy.